How to Lose Your BIG BUT!

by Kenny Eller on January 6, 2011


That’s how many seconds are in each calendar year.

Now, now, now, now, now…a few more gone, sprayed like they’ve been released from an automatic weapon, past your life never to be captured again.

You’ll probably chew up over 240 just reading this post.

If you don’t mind me asking, exactly how old are you right now?

How many seconds or moments have you already spent?

Do you feel time is of the essence?  Or is that just another empty saying, like the powerful four letter word love, that people regurgitate because they think it’s the thing to say.

Do YOU mean it?  Seriously? Do you?

This isn’t a feel good post.  This one isn’t going to make ya feel warm and fuzzy.  It’s time to get down deep and search.

It’s time to lose that BIG BUT.


I would but I just don’t have the time these days.

I really wish I could but I’ve got too many responsibilities now to be doing that.

I would but I just don’t make enough money.

I’d run, I’d blog, I’d write, I’d sing, I’d dance, I’d travel, I’d play, I’d do this and I’d do that, BUT I’ve told myself I’m limited.  I’ve told myself it’s too much.  I’ve told myself it’s not for me anymore.

You’ve told yourself a LIE.

The LIE is Hungry

Are you mad at me for calling you out?

Do you want to stop reading now?

Do I just not understand YOUR situation?

Do you want to share your EXCUSE with me?

The lie is so hungry.  It wants to eat your dreams.  It wants to keep you right where you are.   The lie doesn’t want to see you progress.  It doesn’t want you to shine.  The lie doesn’t want people emulating your success.  The lie wants to be spread.

You must not continue to feed the lie.

An Overwhelming Response

Life can be so overwhelming.   Maybe you work hard at a job you don’t feel passionate about, to make money to support yourself and your family.  A family that by the time you get home, you’re almost too tired to really cherish.   You do this over and over again, year after year.

Now, now, now, now, now…more time is gone.

You used to dream big things for yourself.  HUGE, INSPRING THINGS!

BUT how can you possibly still even attempt to follow your passion when you can barely get through what you’re doing now?

I hear ya…it can be overwhelming.

How to eat away at the But one bite at a time (Something My Dad Taught Me)

I bought my first home right after I turned 24 years old.   I wanted to invest in the market, but my Dad advised, no he made me, buy a house. 😉  (Note:  Had I invested at that time (pre 9/11), I would still be living at home…haha.  Thanks Dad!)

For the first few years of my banking career I also had a second job writing the sports section for a local newspaper.

I had a girlfriend as well, and all what comes with a relationship.

I was busy.

I worked 40-45 hours a week at the bank, nights and all weekend on the paper, and the rest of the time I would squeeze in some hoops, time with friends and family and time with the girlfriend.

I wasn’t making a whole heck of a lot of money at the time either.  That coupled with the fact that I have two of the hardest working people ever as parents, meant I took care of the yard work and everything else that goes along with being a homeowner.

When I bought my first home, two retirees had owned it prior.  They had flowers growing in places I didn’t even know you could grow flowers.  It was immaculate.  The curb appeal was sky high.

That appeal lasted for awhile, but then I was overwhelmed.   I just didn’t have the time needed to maintain the lawns pristine appearance, rather it wasn’t my priority.  So the weeds started growing.   The bushes went months without trimming.  My grass wasn’t edged along the sidewalks and driveway.   About the only thing I did keep up with was the mowing of the grass.

My parents would pass by, call me and drop hints, but I just couldn’t see how I would ever be able to maintain it all.  It stressed me.  You have to understand I have two parents who plant things for fun, who landscape and mow and enjoy it.

I told my Dad one evening, I just couldn’t do it.  It was too much.  I didn’t care.  I was beyond frustrated!

He listened and then he taught.

He said, if you look at every single thing you have to do and clump it all together, it will seem overwhelming.   It will appear to be too much.

He went on with, but if you break it down in to bite size pieces.   If you take one section at a time and put a little time in each evening, you’ll slowly start chipping away at it.

He continued, don’t try and kill yourself with doing it all in one day.   Spread it out, because it’s not going anywhere, but get out there and start.  Before you know it, you’ll have it done!  I’d be more than willing to come help!

I have used that life lesson over and over again in my life.

Whenever I begin to feel overwhelmed and stressed, I try and take a step back and figure out how to chip away one bite at a time.

I’m no Judge

I wear no black robe.  I own not one gavel.  I’m not here to judge.

I’m here to inspire as others, like my Dad, have inspired me.

Life will always present you with an obstacle.  The lie will forever be hungry.

Though, no matter your individual situation, there is always another pushing through.   Another who cut ties with the lie long ago and instead chose to LIVE!

What you do with your life is your choice.

Now, now, now, now, now…more time is slipping by.

Are you ready to lose your BIG BUT???

Get Out There and Start!

I hope that my story in some way helps you to get back on track.   To realize that nothing is impossible, impossible just take a bit longer.

As cliché as it sounds, it really does all begin with one step.  There is so much to be had in life.   All the things you dreamt about.  The things you still keep deep inside for no one else to see anymore, can be had.

I know your situation may seem like it’s too much, but please try bite size pieces.  I think you’ll be amazed at how quickly YOUR curb appeal returns.

Now, now, now, now, now…the seconds keep flowing.

It’s time to say goodbye forever to that BIG BUT!

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{ 8 comments… read them below or add one }

Kellie Kowalski January 6, 2011 at 9:04 am

Awesome post!

I was just having a conversation yesterday about excuses being a waste of time and energy. You can keep complaining about how you can’t do something, or just start doing it. Even if it’s just one small thing at a time!


Kenny Eller Kenny Eller January 6, 2011 at 6:06 pm

Thanks for the kinds words Kellie!!!! I totally agree with your conversation. This needs to be the year of the DO!


Adam January 6, 2011 at 1:50 pm

Hi Kenny,

This is a great post. This is a problem I’ve always struggled with so it’s a timely reminder!



Kenny Eller Kenny Eller January 6, 2011 at 6:07 pm

Thanks for the comment Adam! I really appreciate it and am glad that the post helped!


Jim Kerkvliet January 10, 2011 at 1:31 pm

A clever title Kenny. First I thought I was going to be reading about burning calories off to shrink the size of the “Butt”. This is a good continuation of a couple of posts ago about making and keeping a resolution.

Steph sent me a link after she read the “Alive right now” post. Some points are reflective of what you have stated again in this post. We need to continue strive to move forward but also allow ourselves to be shaped along the way.

Here are a few samples from the link she sent me.

5. Resolved, Never to lose one moment of time, but to improve it in the most profitable way I possibly can.

6. Resolved, To live with all my might, while I do live.

7. Resolved, Never to do any thing, which I should be afraid to do if it were the last hour of my life.

Here is the link if you want to take something from it for a future post.


Kenny Eller Kenny Eller January 10, 2011 at 10:15 pm

Thanks Jim! I knew the “But” in the title would draw you in…haha…only kidding. 😉

As always, thank you both for the support! That is an awesome read, thanks for sharing!


John S. December 10, 2012 at 12:38 pm

Craziest thing is I just posted an article this morning with the same message. Must be something in the air. HAHA

But of course Kenny, we both just want to see people achieve their highest selves and stop living life going through the motions. It is so important for us to not be sheep because there are so many sheep already. We need to he herders of our own lives and choose what makes us happy.

Of course people have their opinions and suggestions as to what they think makes us happy (gadgets, cars, money, etc) but our hearts tells us everyday what actually makes each of us really come alive.

The hardest part is following it because of fear as you stated. Excuses. That’s all they are. I will continue to post this quote until everyone starts following their heart and doing what they are passionate about.

“If it’s important to you, you’ll find a way. If not, then you’ll find an excuse.”

Again, thanks for being an inspiration to all of us Kenny!


Kenny Eller Kenny Eller January 1, 2013 at 7:58 am

Awesome words! Thank you John for your inspiration as well!


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